Why we need to be emotional?

Reminders on how important it is to be filled with emotions and not succumb to the more apathetic world of practicality and logic.

                               
Around 7 years ago, as an associate trainee, I missed doing something at work that I was specifically asked to do. My boss even left me a note so that I don't miss it. The task itself was really simple. But somehow, somewhere, I misunderstood what I was supposed to do and left some details to my assumptions. In short, I blew it for the very first time which warranted me being sent to my managers corner-room (aka the 'Principals Office') to get a good lambasting.

That first time that I ever got scolded at work really taught me a lesson - more than learning how to avoid that same mistake again was that it's necessary for me to not take anything personally and not let any emotions be mixed up in my beating. And I had to convince myself that taking out the emotions was really crucial for two reasons - 1.) so I don't go home feeling sorry and regretting what I could have done instead; and 2.) so I can come to the office the coming days and move forward not carrying that chip on my shoulder, doubting my confidence and self-esteem.

Professionally, leaning less on emotional decisions all seemed logical and I could really attest that, at least, for me it worked that I deal with my job not taking anything personally and leaving out all my emotions to rest. It made me think logically. I was more rational and practical and in many ways, more efficient in making my decisions at work which got me noticed and lead to my progressive career, in my humble opinion. At least from where I saw it, I had the winning formula. So far so good... or, so I thought.
                                  


When I entered into a relationship, years after rolling solo and enjoying my early years as young professional, single and ready to mingle, my entire perspective on staying more logical than emotional became really problematic.

I never thought that being single minded on what's plain and practical could go against so many basic aspects in a relationship. For instance, sharing a meal to eat at the same time when one of you has to wait for hours just to make it so. Or when you are dead tired from work but a still voice inside you insists that you see you're special someone, then you go the stretch just to have that short conversation. I mean, why wait when you're already starving? Why push out for some more time to make that visit despite the fatigue?


As I look at it now, I believe that the reason being logical and practical takes the back seat towards a genuine relationship is because we are not meant to build relationships out of these two. We can't deal with our lives with that distant approach of not being involved emotionally specially when it comes to the people we chose to love. Really, how can you love without the emotion of it? If loved worked under specific terms of mutual benefit, then I'd say that's not love more than it is a business deal. And that as my first point, is that emotions are necessary for building strong and honest relationship with our fellow human. And relationships are the design with which we are made - it puts meaning to our existence and purpose to the people around us.

Another reason, I believe, why we need emotions in our lives is because it is the driving force behind our motivations, our commitments and our reasons for doing what we do. We need emotions to be fully functional. And here, I mean to distinguish and differentiate what it means to be fully functional in the basic, menial sense compared to someone operating inspired and highly motivated - driven. I believe that the stronger the emotional attachment we have towards a goal, the better the likelihood of it becoming a reality. Steve Jobs said, you have to love what you do. And I believe that because, I think, the fact behind it is not easy chasing a dream. If it were in fact easy, everyone would have made it happen for themselves to whatever desire they cherished in their hearts. The sad truth is, life is tough. More often that not, it's more rational to quit and hang the towel, than to press on and keep fighting. And here is where emotions empower the heart to be relentless and ever hopeful. 

The last reason why I believe we need to be emotional in life, is because our emotions simply escape all sense of logic. Our emotions are limitless because they could not be quantified, objectified or subjected to norms and boundaries. No one could have a universal definition of what it is like to feel joy, or sadness, or despair. Because it comes as it is and it is simply lived in the moment. And because it is boundless, it allows us to transcend our current obstacles, challenges, and circumstances. It allows us to see something magical out of the ordinary and appreciate how beautiful life is. It makes us more than rational minds making logical sense of the world. It makes us truly human.

... 'just my two cents.

Cheers,
Stephen